The Comfort of My Own Bed

We all have days when we just don't want to get out of bed - and days the rest of the world probably wishes we hadn't. Those days when we wake up with a headache or don't fall asleep until the hour our alarm goes off or we get up and in the first ten minutes a hundred things go wrong are hard on us and those around us. The key to surviving days like that is attitude and perspective.

Today was one of those days for me, I knew it was time to get up but my body just didn't want to. Unfortunately for me on days like this my body usually wins because, well because the mind and spirit are willing but the flesh is weak. See in the world of chronic pain there are days when you literally can not get out of bed, not because you don't feel like it but because you aren't able. Sure, once I got sitting up I could have moved my legs over the edge of the bed (by grabbing my knees and MOVING my legs) bit would YOU want to walk around on sword tips while a thousand needles were jabbed in your legs? I didn't think so! Better to take another round of meds (now kept in my bedside table and not the bathroom for just such reasons) and wait for the pain to ease up.

So now we come to the question of what to do while 'relaxing in the comfort' of bed. One can choose to dwell on the pain, complain about the fact that if you take it easy on your legs it's makes your back hurt all the more, obsess about what you could/should/want to be doing or (and this is a BIG OR) you can use the time for more important things - positive things.

Instead of dwelling on the needles, pins and knives in my legs today I chose to spend my 'down' time praying and reading. Usually on days like this I read Job cause well he's my man. Satan took away all Job had in life - his children, his fortune and his health - and Job still chose to praise God through it all. Even when Mrs. Job yelled "Curse God and die" from the hovel they were living in up to the top of the trash heap Job was sitting on he refused to turn His back on God. Much as I love Job today I wanted something different so I started reading Psalms which I don't often do. I started with the First Psalm figuring I'd get to the Twenty-Third pretty fast but there is a lot of meat on those poetic bones! After an hour or more I got to the 22nd Psalm and there stopped to dwell.

"I am poured out like water,
And all my bones are out of joint;
My heart is like wax;
It has melted within me.
My strength is dried up like a potsherd,
My tongue clings to my jaws;
And you have brought me to the dust of death."

Well hello! If that didn't describe how I felt I don't know what could! Needless to say I went back to the beginning of the Psalm and REALLY read it. While this is one of the prophetic Psalms describing Messiah it is also a promise that I really need to hear sometimes. God hasn't forgotten me, He doesn't despise me, He hasn't turned His back on me or caused this to happen to me. He has ALLOWED it to happen, not MADE it happen and there is a difference.

God hears my prayers and He answers them! Sometimes I don't like the answers ('Lord, I want to feel better' meant I wanted to be like everyone else NOT be told I HAD to go on disability) but if we take time (like when we are stuck in bed) and are in the right frame of mind (dwelling on the things of Heaven and not the pain or what we can't do perhaps?) things come to light that were missed in the darkness of our personal gloom.

I got phone calls made AND got answers today because i took time to really explain what I wanted, how much I needed and what I needed it for. I prayed for people today that I haven't seen in years because I had the time to go down my Facebook friends list and do that. And perhaps most importantly I was reminded that there is no amount of physical pain that I suffer which Christ has not already felt and dealt with.
So, the next time I have a day that sees me spending more time in bed then I would like you know what I'll be doing - after I take my meds - I'll be going back to the Book, looking for more comfort and going over my list of friends and family praying for their comfort!

Sometimes I think it would be nice to spend a day in bed being lazy, eating bonbons and reading magazines but truthfully that's not how I'm made. So for now it's 'up and at'em' every chance I get and when my body decides otherwise, well I'll put my willing mind to good use while the weak body gets the rest it demands.


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